Are you Alone even in togetherness ?

Not lonely but alone. I want to look into the aspect of me getting hurt , want to look at it more attentively when it hits me. You get hurt and what follows is a range of emotions based on the individual psyche or past impressions as memories from previous experiences, a reaction whose sole purpose is to sustain the feeling of hurt. The sustenance is due to feeling of incompleteness and is because of the continuous series of thoughts wanting to fill this incompleteness, so it exist. Hurt we think will go away with time, but it doesnt, it deposits only in the subconsciousness. To eradicate hurt, is to feel it and be calm and then in that tranquility a question will arise, whether the hurt caused is intentional? or perceived notion. Even if it is intentional, how can an unwanted experience, memory or a thought seek in without our notice, should it be encouraged? Being alert, attentive, observant will only catch the escaping hurt which takes the form of either reaction or distraction.

Eventhough human beings live in a society and in togetherness yet they live in crowded isolations, because of a self which they are made to have, build and nurture because of dumping of others insecurities in form of opinion, advice and comments as parents, as elders , as advisors and well wishers. The idea of wanting to be someone is picked up by the fresh innocent uncorrupted mind , and sets the course and the pace of living always overshadowed by fear about an illusionary future and the idea that whatver we are isnt enough or that we should always become something.

In being together, are we wanting and trying to understand the differences among us or understand what is common or only just strengthen and assert the idea of who we are?. That which is common among us has brought this togetherness to understand the differences.To relate is being willing to understand the differences and move to the path of acceptance or change. That which is common is already related, do you also see it?

World without Conflict - An Utopian Dream

Can there be a world without conflict?

Has the world since we know it had been without a conflict?

Is the idea and dream that there can exist a world without conflict , utopian?

I ask myself all these questions wanting to investigae and sincerely find out. It is obvious on the onset it cannot be, so why dwell into this question? I have rejected so many such questions without having looked deeper into the meanings and have taken for granted all my life. I have been always asked to believe and do things which satisfies my parents, family, teachers, friends, collegues and the society.

For those who are free of internal conflict having mastered the mind it is not. For those who exist and fight everyday with conflict, conflict arises from their very own minds and the conflict of the world what they see is the superimposition of their own mind.

What is Subtle Criticism?

The same questioner is going to find out for himself introspectively the meaning and answer to the question. Why do I go into this topic,it is to truly question myself have i been subtly critcizing towards anyone anytime and what is the right reaction if i have been told i do ?

To criticize is to judge someone on his/her actions/thought or work. Judging is a thought process whose nature unlike most forms of thought not a movement but inert. It is inert because it is resultant of the thought machinery which we call the mind to conclude , make a decision, arrive at an opinion about the object or subject under observance by ones thought.

Criticism need not be created externally, it can also be perceived in one's own mind and thus it becomes a reality. What we think we become. Is criticism and finding fault means the same? Not necessarily , criticism does not take the responsibility and ownership as that of finding fault, for the later is more scientific, logical , sometimes demonstrative and not necessarily opinionated. Criticsm is more from a perspective approach where the gap is sufficently larger between the critcized and critcizer and could very well mean sensible only to him and could in many instances be a personal, individualistic thing.

A subtle criticism, is one that is said without the owner not daring to take the responsibility for whatever is being judged for whatever interest or idea that may sustain it. Its subtle nature is an avoidance of a resulting possibility of a confrontation or any equivalent higher or lower degree of emotional reaction and could also be demonstrated out of fear, insecurity or sarcasm.

To subtly criticize is an irresponsible , insensitive act among friends or loved ones. It is completely outside the periphery of love and compassion and doesnt serve except to severe relationships and strain and hurt it. It is principally out of non acceptance and inability to look into as-it-is. Its a very powerful negative emotion which does not serve to better any purpose, its like a dry heat causing blisters and cannot exist in well founded and deeply rooted relationships which is not based on emotional, economic,psychological or pure intellectual dependence.

Living in Relationship

Relationship is an alive thing, it is about the present. Very very live, and is real and will show itself when you look for it , just like the beating of the heart. It is of the present , a continuous river. It has to be lived not studied. It has to applied not acquired. It has to be felt not possessed. It is about wisdom not knowledge. Many of the books on reviving / rescuing relationship thus for a novice or an inexperienced person would be just a storehouse of unnecesary knowledge leading to confusion and conflicts , for its application would be more a robotic act and not out of spontaneity. Relationship is a mirror , you would come to know about yourself first and how the self relates with the other. To be in a relationship is to be vulnerable but also unconditional without dependencies. The greatest obstacle to it is the constant fear of wanting to sustain it and in that process there is a great loss of energy spent in nourshing the fear and personal insecurity. Relationship is something profound and is the basis which we built everything around us, the friends, family, society and this world and that seed with all its beauty needs to be understood and unshaken, if not brings crisis, conflicts and miseries within and around. Relationship is inevitable but yet it is still a choice because one could only try to evade and escape but cannot really. In this interconnected and interdependent world, everyone is in some form or the other already related. The relationships we choose from are essentially not to satisfy our pleasures for pleasure is based on time, but to understand us much better in light of others. Relationship is understanding one being as two and not two wanting to become one. Relationship is not about becoming , it is about being , it is already is. Trying to act to satisfy or work out a relationship is a wrong idea of the mind, it will eventually realise and understand the beauty and depth of the inner being by which we are all related already.

You cannot be related to yourself. You cannot be related to your thoughts for your thoughts is you and no way different. Relationship is in duality, the self is , just is. Humanity in its basic fundamental core form is already related for it is one homogenous mass, the division and plurality is created by the process of thought , which we get so attached and end up building strong self images wanting to seperate and uniquely find a place against natures well founded harmony, thus creating this mass chaos and conflicts and living in self satisfying pocketed relationships of groups, sects, religions and nationalities. Relationships should be of freedom and completeness not a platform for self satisfying desires and pleasures. Its about us , not about me.

Aurobindo on Shankara

Integral Yoga of Aurobindo refers to Self or Brahman being active in the manifested world as well as in the super conscious plane, thus rejecting the Shankara philosophy of Mithya , stating the world is an illusion.


"The Shankara knowledge is, as your Guru pointed out, only one side of the Truth; it is the knowledge of the Supreme as realised by the spiritual Mind through the static silence of the pure Existence. It was because he went by this side only that Shankara was unable to accept or explain the origin of the universe except as illusion, a creation of Maya. Unless one realises the Supreme on the dynamic as well as the static side, one cannot experience the true origin of things and the equal reality of the active Brahman. The Shakti or Power of the Eternal becomes then a power of illusion only and the world becomes incomprehensible, a mystery of cosmic madness, an eternal delirium of the Eternal. Whatever verbal or ideative logic one may bring to support it, this way of seeing the universe explains nothing; it only erects a mental formula of the inexplicable. It is only if you approach the Supreme through his double aspect of Sat and Chit-Shakti, double but inseparable, that the total truth of things can become manifest to the inner experience. This other side was developed by the Shakta Tantriks. The two together, the Vedantic and the Tantric truth unified, can arrive at the integral knowledge."