Egoic Self - Stillness Speaks by Eckhart Tolle

Built into the very structure of the egoic self is a need to oppose, resist and exclude to maintain the sense of seperateness on which its continued survival depends. So thee is "me" against the "other", "us" against "them".

The ego needs to be in conflict with something or someone. That explains why you are looking for peace and joy and love but cannot tolerate them for very long. You say you want happiness but are additced to your unhapiness. Your unhapiness ultimately arises not from the circumstances of your life but from the conditioning of your mind.

Almost every ego contains at least an element of what we might call "victim identity". Some people have such a strong victim image of themseleves that it becomes their central core of their ego. Resentment and ego form their essential sense fo self.

Even if your grievances are completely "unjustified" you have constructed an identity got yourself that is much like a prison whose bars are made of thought forms. Feel the emotional attachment you have to your victim story and become aware of the compulsion to think or talk about it. Be there as witnessing presence of your inner state. You dont have to do anything. With awareness comes transformation and freedom.